Count The Cost

"For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it.  luke 14:28"

Whet it comes to building, the best thing to do is to plan. After deciding to build a house and consulting an architect to design it for you, the next thing is to consult a Quantity Surveyor (Cost expert)  who will help you calculate the total money it will cost you to complete the house taking into account the cost of Materials, Labour, equipment and every other things needed for the project.
Knowing this will help you to know if you can afford to build the house and also help you  to see how your money will be spent on the project (The cost is usually broken down into the different stages of the construction process).

There are so many uncompleted projects around today because many are ignorant of the total cost of completing the project and as soon as they start and continue with the project,  they get to realize that they don't have enough money to finance the project.

The same principles  applies to Relationship and Marriage. Before you start a relationship and commit yourself to the marriage Covenant, there is need for you to COUNT THE COST and examine yourself to see if you have the spiritual, emotional and financial resources to sustain the relationship/marriage.


Just like the uncompleted projects,  the reason for so many breakups and divorces today is the IGNORANCE of what relationship/marriage entails and demands.

The bible says in Hosea 4:6 that "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge"
A lot of relationship and marriage have also been destroyed because of IGNORANCE.
The question Jesus asked the pharisees who came to question him about marriage in Matthew 19:4 was "Have You Not Read? ".
And this implies that Jesus expects us to understand what relationship and the marriage Covenant entails by READING.

The bible also says that we should get  Wisdom (the principal thing) and understanding. Prov 4:7

Wisdom is very important in life and for you to succeed in your relationship and marriage, you need wisdom.

Building a relationship/marriage requires wisdom (prov 24:3).
Proverb 14:1 says "a wise woman builds her house"
So, you need wisdom. Wisdom gives you direction in life. Eccl 10:10b says "wisdom is profitable to direct". Get wisdom and never despise wisdom.

Sometimes, it baffles me when I see people who are succeeding in their academics, career and ministry but are failing in their relationship/marriage.
And in my quest to know the cause of these failed relationship/marriage, I have discovered that many don't pay attention to learning and acquiring knowledge about relationship/marriage like they do for their career and ministry.

Isn't it surprising that some people can pay millions to study some professional courses in their chosen career even after spending close to 12 to 15years of learning from elementary class to university level but can't pay a dime to learn and acquire knowledge about marriage and family life?

Some can even travel out of the country to study and attend business conferences for a career or business they will one day retire from but can't even attend a marriage seminar that is free and close to them for a marriage they cannot retire from (marriage is a life time commitment. It is till death).

Dear friends, how many books do you have and have you read on relationship, marriage, and parenting?
How many relationship conferences and marriage seminars have you attended?

Reading books and attending relationship conferences and marriage seminars will help you to know the cost. It is like consulting the QS in order to know the cost of your construction project. This will help you to know what relationship and marriage entails and demands, thereby counting the cost.

Finally, proverb 24:5-6 says "A wise man is strong; yea, a man of knowledge increaseth strength.
For by wise counsel thou shalt make thy war: and in multitude of counsellors there is safety".
Wisdom and knowledge gives you strength and make you strong. The wise counsels you get from books and marriage seminars  make and keep you safe.

See the benefits of wisdom in proverb 24:13-14
"My son, eat honey. It is good for you. Honey is sweet when you taste it.
In the same way, knowledge of wisdom are good for your life. If you find them, you will have hope for future days. What you hope for will not come to an end"

The good marriage, happy home and godly children you desire and hope for will come to pass when you seek wisdom and devote yourself to acquiring knowledge.

My joy is to see marriages succeed and godly family raised and i so much believe that God will do it but we must Count the Cost.

Thanks for reading.
Mega Shalom.

The Relationship Doctor